My thoughts on God

I’ve been in a very contemplative state lately. I feel like I am in a stage of really trying to prioritize what is important to me and of trying to understand God better.  Do I remember to pray every morning and night? No. Do I read my scriptures often enough? No. Am I at a stage where I am ready to be more gentle with myself and where I am in my spiritual progression? Yes. Does it help a person who is trying to get healthier to beat themselves up when they slip and have seconds on dessert? No way. I am really starting to learn that focusing on my weaknesses in my spiritual progression is the same way. I think human beings thrive and are much more successful when we focus and build on our strengths and the positive and good. As imperfect as I am, I also know that I have been blessed with some spiritual strengths (and have been reminded of some of them lately). I am trying to focus on and build upon those strengths right now.

One of the words that keeps repeating in my head over and over lately is “light.” I have been trying harder to lately to bring “light” into my life. Light can come in the form of where I am physically, who I am with, what I am doing, what I am thinking, what I am reading etc.. If a conversation with a friend starts feeling too dark, I am reminded that I need light in my life. If I am impatient with my kids and talk to them in a mean tone, I can feel the light within me start to fade. But the good news is is that I can quickly do things to start bringing it back.

Another thing I have really been contemplating lately is God and my relationship with Him. And when I say him, I am also very certain that there is a loving Heavenly Mother, so I have also been thinking about Her and what my relationship ought to be with Her. I can’t help but think that she wouldn’t have some extremely insightful advice to me as a woman and mother.  I wonder why we don’t talk about a Heavenly Mother more. This is something I have also been pondering.

This last week I have been given several reminders that God is so very real. I had this book recommended to my this last week, and as I am a sucker for children’s books, I went and bought it the next day.

This book was a really good reminder to me of God’s role in well… everything. God connects us to this wonderful earth that we live on. We can see God through the beauty of the earth. We should see God in each other. I truly have felt like the more that I look for God, the more I see God in everything. This is why I LOVE working with children. It is so very easy to see God in children. They are so pure and precious. It can honestly be a little harder to see God in adults at times, but I really do think that there is something good to see in everyone. It really is amazing to think of how much better the world would be if we all tried harder to see the goods in others. There is so much pride in this world of ours.

The next thing that really got me thinking about God this week was this song by Regina Spektor:

I’ve heard this song many times before, but for some reason, I really took the time to listen to it this time. I was so struck by the lyrics:

No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re starving or freezing or so very poor

 

No one laughs at God
When the doctor calls after some routine tests
No one’s laughing at God
When it’s gotten real late
And their kid’s not back from the party yetNo one laughs at God
When their airplane start to uncontrollably shake
No one’s laughing at God
When they see the one they love, hand in hand with someone else
And they hope that they’re mistaken

No one laughs at God
When the cops knock on their door
And they say we got some bad news, sir
No one’s laughing at God
When there’s a famine or fire or flood

But God can be funny
At a cocktail party when listening to a good God-themed joke, or
Or when the crazies say He hates us
And they get so red in the head you think they’re ‘bout to choke
God can be funny,
When told he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way
And when presented like a genie who does magic like Houdini
Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus
God can be so hilarious
Ha ha
Ha ha

No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
When they’ve lost all they’ve got
And they don’t know what for

No one laughs at God on the day they realize
That the last sight they’ll ever see is a pair of hateful eyes
No one’s laughing at God when they’re saying their goodbyes
But God can be funny
At a cocktail party when listening to a good God-themed joke, or
Or when the crazies say He hates us
And they get so red in the head you think they’re ‘bout to choke
God can be funny,
When told he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way
And when presented like a genie who does magic like Houdini
Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus
God can be so hilarious

No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one laughing at God in hospital
No one’s laughing at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God when they’re starving or freezing or so very poor

No one’s laughing at God
No one’s laughing at God
No one’s laughing at God
We’re all laughing with God

How often do people forget or even mock God? I know that it really is so much easier to rely on God when times are hard but then we forget to give Him (and Her??) credit for all of the beauty and good that is in our lives. Many people even doubt the existence of God or think there is no need for a higher being. There are many things I don’t understand in this life, but the fact that God is and loves each of infinitely is something I do not doubt. At all. Sometimes I forget. Sometimes I feel lonely. Sometimes I disappoint myself and feel so small.  Sometimes I feel hopeless in moments but then I receive a tender mercy to remind me. So many people I know have been answers to prayers lately and remind me that I am not forgotten and that God cares so much about me, but not anymore than he does any of His children. He really does see the great potential and worth in all of us. And I really think that nothing makes Him/Her happier than when we see the good in the people that aren’t easy to see the good in and when we take care of our brothers and sisters. There really are so many things I don’t understand in this life or even within the Mormon culture/doctrine, but I do know that God loves us! And it is one of my greatest missions to help my children feel and share this love! Should you ever struggle or doubt God, give me a call. I can remind you of many things that are special unique to you. And why God loves you too!

 

 

Becky hillstrom - July 11, 2014 - 7:27 am

Thanks Kara! That thought was a really good way to start my morning. I’ve had some experiences lately where God has let me know that He is aware of me. And right back at you…if you ever doubt or feel disappointed, give me a call. I’ll tell you all sorts of wonderful and unique things about you.

Niki Wieland - July 11, 2014 - 7:41 am

Kara you are able to write and share in such an eloquent way! I agree with you on everything you have said, and it is so sad to me that there are so many who feel there is no God, and how lonely that must feel. I know that when I really try to find the hand of God in my life I find it in the smallest of acts to of course the big ones, my favorite is the small things that I never realized were Him!

Thanks for sharing so beautifully your thoughts on God and I hope you know that you are a light to me!

kara - July 14, 2014 - 10:16 pm

Becky and Niki,
You are both people I really admire. Easy to see God in you two :)!!