Parents, don’t dress your girls like tramps

(Look at this adorable, sweet, smart, bright, and INNOCENT little girl)

Okay, I would really really appreciate if you would all take 5 minutes to go and read this article. Like pretty please with a cherry on top?? I am dying to know what all of you think about this? I made a post similar to this on my old blog after hearing some 10-11 year old girls at the park talking about how they were going to leave their houses in outfits and then change into their “sexy” outfits when they got to the dance(girls this age go to dances???!!). I looked at those girls and I just wanted to cry, seriously.

I was at a birthday party awhile back, and ┬áspied (when she didn’t know that I was watching) a 5 or 6 year old girl lift up her shirt to show the other kids her bra. Umm… seriously??? I was in shock. I love in the article when it says:
“And then I realize as creepy as it is to think a store like Abercrombie is offering something like the “Ashley”(a push up bra for little girls), the fact remains that sex only sells because people are buying it. No successful retailer would consider introducing an item like a padded bikini top for kindergarteners if they didn’t think people would buy it.”

I totally think this dude is right on. Yeah.. it is a shame that we have all of the Miley Cyrus and Brittney Spear type role models out there for our girls, but we as parents choose what our young girls own. They would not market these things towards young girls, if parents of young girls didn’t buy them. Like seriously, almost nothing gets me more fired up than objectifying precious innocent little girls. So parents, let’s not buy that crap. Little girls should be wearing comfortable leggings they can play in with flowered dresses, not clothes that look like they are made for hoochie mama adults but in tiny sizes.

I am trying to not be naive to the fact that when Sofia goes to school next year, she will be influenced a lot more by her peers, but I know that we will be her biggest influence. I think it starts with what we let our little girls wear, the stories we read them, the shows they watch, and the toys we buy them at a young age. I will leave you all to ponder with the last line in the article (and please please let me know what you all think!)

“A line needs to be drawn, but not by Abercrombie. Not by Britney Spears. And not by these little girls who don’t know better and desperately need their parents to be parents and not 40-year-old BFFs.”

Okay, I am stepping off of my soap box for now :).


nancy - April 28, 2011 - 8:50 am

I can’t comment beyond “I agree 100%” because the thought of 5 year old girls wearing bras is making me physically ill, and don’t even get me started on “juicy couture”… My nieces (8&9 yrs) were wearing short shorts with “juicy” printed across their rear ends last time I saw them, and I don’t know what planet my SIL is living on if she doesn’t see the inappropriateness there… ick ick ick

adrienne w - April 28, 2011 - 8:52 am

I read this article about a week ago and I could not agree more. One of my pet peeves has always been little girls or babies in bikinis, because the bikini is such a sex symbol! I don’t know why parents think it’s cute to make their girls look like mini grown ups! Thankfully, it is possible to avoid it. Macartney has survived kindergarten without knowing who any of those pop star idols are or caring at all what they dress like. She is so oblivious to that kind of thing because we don’t expose her to it. Even when kids start school, while they are young, parents are still the biggest influence in their lives, so why not use that time to shelter them from those kind of examples?

kara - April 28, 2011 - 9:13 am

Here are facebook comments in case some of you aren’t on there with me!!

Shannon I am right there with ya, Mama! :)

Afton Muir I’ll join you on that soap box Kara, shouting till I’m blue in the face. Let our little girls and boys be LITTLE!

Adrienne Wigg- Amen, sista!

leonne bannister - April 28, 2011 - 9:26 am

I totally agree with you, Kara (and the other comments.) It seems as though as Olivia gets older some manner of defensive parenting is going to have to come into play. One in which I teach her how to think critically, yet I also sheild her from the absolute absurdity of wearing a thong at 10 years old.

Leah - April 28, 2011 - 9:59 am

I read the same article the other day and totally agree! Speak with your pocketbooks mamas!

Angeli - April 28, 2011 - 10:31 am

I’m so thrilled to see someone stepping up and saying this outright! I saw it reposted on facebook by about six different friends (and bear in mind, I’m no facebook maven) and I love that it’s getting around. We started talking about modesty when Clara was three, and we’ve kept it a common topic. It’s been hard, because Clara would love them, but we don’t have Barbies in the house, and she knows it’s because we don’t like their unrealistic body shape and re clothes aren’t modest. I don’t know what’s goon to happen when she gets older – maybe she will want to rebel by wearing “sexy” clothes, but we’re starting the dialogue now. She’s going to know what message she send by wearing those things, and she’s going to know why we think it’s false and harmful. Her dad is totally involved, too, which I think is going to have a major impact.

Amanda - April 28, 2011 - 10:43 am

I couldn’t agree more! Baby bikinis drive me out of my mind, but I hadn’t heard about the A&F push up bras. Disgusting! There is a big difference between being naive and keeping your little girl in age-appropriate clothing. Sofia is lucky to have you looking out for her interests!

Michelle - April 28, 2011 - 11:54 am

My favorite line by far:

“The way I see it, my son can go to therapy later if my strict rules have scarred him. But I have peace knowing he’ll be able to afford therapy as an adult because I didn’t allow him to wear or do whatever he wanted as a kid.”

kara - April 28, 2011 - 1:58 pm

Ooh… I seriously just got all pumped up reading all of your comments. It makes me want all of us to get together and picket in front of Abercrombie :). Like Leah said, though, your pocketbook speaks. What we spend our money on shows what we value. But seriously… where is the closest abercrombie to Corvallis :)???

Amanda O. - April 28, 2011 - 3:08 pm

I also agree with you and the article.. I don’t consider myself overly conservative but recently had this same conversation with my sister about little girls involved in dance classes/competitions where they wear globs of make-up, skimpy outfits, fake eye lashes, have fake tans etc. We both agreed that it’s just not appropriate. I’m a bit on the fence regarding bikinis… I think some 2 piece swim suits are appropriate- definitely easier for girls to use the restroom etc., but as far as the skimpy ones and which just allow for more sun burns etc- don’t think its a great idea. Besides, I wouldn’t want some pervy old man checking out my little one.

Rachel - April 28, 2011 - 7:30 pm

Yeah, and what is with the Bratz dolls? I saw that Ty has a Bratz type doll at Toy Factory that seems a little better, but if you look at the adjectives in front of their names (like Sizzlin Sue) they don’t have anything to do with ability or personality. They are about appearance. Uck. I get mad that places (like Toy Factory) carry 4 girl outfits for every boy outfit, but I guess you pay for it later.

Wendy M - April 28, 2011 - 7:38 pm

I am also against “sexy” clothing for little ones, but I honestly don’t have a problem with a bikini on a little girl. I think there is something wrong with society if they see anything sexual about a little girl in a two-piece. This is my opinion (so please don’t attack me!) but I want my daughter to have the experience of being free and comfortable in her own skin before society convinces her that her body isn’t good enough to wear one.

adrienne w - April 28, 2011 - 8:02 pm

Just to clarify my opinion on bikinis… I don’t think that parents think of it as a sex symbol when they put their little girls in them. I realize that is not how they are seeing it. But historically I think the bikini has been considered a sex symbol. And I think that it makes it harder to transition later. I feel really uncomfortable at the pool or the beach when I see young teenage or pre teen girls in skimpy bikinis, because I know there are definitely sick people out there who find that appealing. So I think intentionally or unintentionally, it perpetuates the sexualization of young girls. And I’m going to do everything I can to prevent that with my own daughters. I want my girls to know that being comfortable with your body does not mean you need to show more of it off.
I also think that a modest TANKini is totally appropriate and can be very practical.
Now don’t get me started on baby/toddler pageants… :)

adrienne w - April 28, 2011 - 8:07 pm

P.S. I definitely do NOT want to attack or judge other parents for the bikini thing. I get it. I just see it differently. Now I am done. Three posts are more than enough. I couldn’t figure out how to edit my last comment.

Claire - April 28, 2011 - 8:30 pm

I only have boys…so my main thing is trying to find clothing that doesn’t have violent pictures or characters all over it. What can’t boys clothes have nice things on them like plants/flowers too?

Amanda Nemelka - April 28, 2011 - 9:50 pm

I didn’t read all the comments first because…whoa…a lot of comments, so if I repeat something someone said…I’m sorry. You and I had this conversation a bit when I was there. I really think it starts young. I have friends who tell me I’m way too open with my kids about things, but I think there is a way to be open and honest with your kids and still make it age appropriate. I fully intend to talk with my daughter about WHY it is important to modest…even at a young age. Girls need to understand what message they are putting out there by dressing a certain way BEFORE they start doing it. They need to see a reason not to. It seems overboard, but I think it has to start young. I never thought about the tank-top issue until a friend brought it up. Sophie wears sleeveless things now, but it’s important to think at what age you don’t want this to happen. When is too old for your daughter to be wearing spaghetti straps? 6? 9? 12? And if you wait too long, it makes it harder to go back and say, “that was fine before, but now it’s not?”

I don’t know. Might sound extreme, but we know as parents that these kids pick up things at such a young age. We have to decide early on what we want to be projected to the world.

Rose - April 29, 2011 - 8:51 pm

Totally agree. It’s sad to see parents dress their girl in sexy outfit and consider it “cute”. What even more sickening is that the clothing company come out with that kind of product.